From Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/03/19 - IP#: 174.239.10.xxx  Click here to reply  
My sons' checkup with the pediatrician went well. She told me that the blood tests show normal blood sugar and cholesterol and something called an A1C test shows no evidence of prediabetes. Their blood pressures are normal. Leo is 5'1" and weighs 227 and Lane is still 4'8" but his weight is now 145. I talked with her afterwards. The need is to keep them from gaining more weight. As they get taller their weights should match their height.
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 04/25/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Janis, I have been walking more with my sons since you wrote. We weighed in this morning and Leo hasn't gained any weight at all, still 227. Lane is up to 153, and I lost a pound. Plus, we've been talking more during our walks.
 
Reply from Janis, Child's Age 14 - 04/04/19  - IP#: 72.235.193.xxx
Based on Leo's school trip, it sounds like he can do well on less food than you're providing, even is does feel hungry at first. Same thing with exercise. If he could handle walking around while on the school trip, he can handles a long evening walk with you and his younger brother. Do you do any physical activity with you sons? Now that spring is here, can you go outside and do something physical? Do they swim? Hot weather isn't that far off and swimming is a great activity for all of you.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/30/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...bars and other snacks.(His friend is chubby too.) They visited historic places which involved a lot of walking but Leo didn't complain afterwards, so I think his weight isn't keeping him from these activities.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/30/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...let them make obj sandwiches. But usually I make enough for all of us, with whatever is leftover being eaten later that evening before bedtime. Last weekend Leo went on a school trip (first time away from home). He liked it but told me there wasn't enough to eat, so he and his friend bought candy...
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/29/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
I've tried making smaller amounts of food but both boys ask for seconds. If the food runs out and they're hungry, I tell them to make sandwiches. What am I supposed to do if they say they're hungry? I can't let my son's go hungry. Besides, they would just eat cookies or chips if I didn't...
 
Reply from Janis, Child's Age 14 - 03/28/19  - IP#: 72.235.193.xxx
Jesse, IMHO I think you're providing your sons wit healthy nourishing food. Based on what you say, you may be preparing too much of it. Do you ever have leftovers for the next day? If not, all of you are probably eating too much. My son Paul, who is 14, can eat a whole roast chicken in one sitting, along with all the sides. Boys from 10 to 14 seem to be hungry all the time, and it's not just fast food or junk food that's fattening. As far as sweatpants go, I know it's very expensive to keep on buying bigger clothes, even at Walmart, if a youngster is growing rapidly.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/25/19  - IP#: 39.44.224.xxx
Then it would be hard to judge if they're over all having healthy food or no, I think they are over eating maybe. Why don't you try to reduce their portion sizes?
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/25/19  - IP#: 39.44.224.xxx
I partially do, but I wouldn't do with the pie, pancakes, Mac and cheese, or meatloaf either. It's okay if they're being fed once a week but if you make high caloried food like meatloaf, Mac and cheese and they snack on cookies and other food and then have desserts like pie and ice cream after..
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Sarah, do you think I'm feeding them healthy food?
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/25/19  - IP#: 39.44.224.xxx
And about sweatpants, I can say from experience. I stopped buying sweatpants for my son and in a few months the weight started to come off, of course with diet and exercise too, but quitting sweatpants played a part too. They are so generous on the waist that a kid eats mindlessly all the time without knowing the consequences on the body, and their waist keeps expanding while they are in self denial, as their clothes still fit, they still get the same amount and type of food so the level of denial is very high. And one can spend a bit more on the pants rather than kids becoming more unhealthy.
Moreover, does your kids throw tantrum if they don't get what they want to eat or not the same amount? How many times have you tried a diet with them and failed?
Do they spend a lot of time on the couch playing videogames and not listen if u ask them to get up and do some physical activity? I had this issue with my son, and I started to take controllers of his Xbox, when he didn't listen and played for more than an 30 mins without any exercise or getting up from the couch, and it helped. How many hours do your sons spend on videogames a day and on television? The main thing however is if you agree that they are obese and you want to make them lose, this also would give some rough days and be tough on the boys but you yourself should understand that it will after all be the best for them in the end, no parent wants to say no to their kids but if they are obese as kids and they are so young and weight more than a healthy adult then there are signs that a parent has to be tough if they want their kids to be healthy in future. Have you ever tried Zumba or calesthenic exercises at home with them mainly your eldest one as he's more overweight, exercises at home like lunges, squats, plank, jumping jacks, sit ups and pull ups will surely help as they helped my son too and show a difference rally quickly only after doing 30 mins of doing combination of these exercises daily, but it depends if your sons waist and belly is his thickest part or his hips and thighs?
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/25/19  - IP#: 39.44.224.xxx
What is your oldest's waist measurements? is his jeans easily available.Then buy a size or two bigger jeans/trousers and wear them with belts rather than wearing sweatpants all the time, they surely contribute to weight gain without making the person realise that they're putting on weight.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/25/19  - IP#: 39.44.224.xxx
food and junk through out the day, so making low caloried and healthy desserts would help maintain the weight because u don't want them to gain more weight without them growing in height too, if that's not happening and their growing wide only then you should start to limit food
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/25/19  - IP#: 39.44.224.xxx
Why don't you try and cut off desserts like pie after dinner, as u say that your son already had cookies so maybe limit that too. It's good that you spend time with him while cooking but why not try recipes that have limited sugar, and are not too high caloried, as kids already have had a lot of..
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
..leftovers. Right now, he's fixing lunch for us (peanut butter and banana sandwiches and microwave tomato soup. He likes "cooking" which is cool and it reminds me of his mom. He gets all excited when we fix one off her recipes.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...favorite. Right after this Lane is going to help me back some cookies from my wife's recipe file. Oh, every Sunday morning I make pancakes, eggs, and sausage/Taylor ham as a treat. Only the 2 of us but I Didn't think and made enough for 3 but a couple hours later I noticed Lane was finishing off the...
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
..but I remind them every day they can eat what they want but must eat their dinner. This week we had meatloaf/mashed potatoes (Mon), pork chops/egg noodles (T), beef stew/dumplings (W), baked beans and franks/cornbread (Th), mac and cheese (F). Tonight we're having homemade baked ziti (Leo's)...
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
..that I can roll up the legs costs less.Same thing with shirts.Both boys are obviously obese, I have a picture of Lane right here as I'm writing this and he looks like a totally different boy, his now is round with chubby cheeks and a double chin.More about food, we do stop for a snack every day...
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...not to have them wear loose clothes isn't practical. Lane wears Leo's hand-me-downs but For Leo, it's cheaper to buy clothes big and let him grow into them. Both boys are hard to fit because of their builds, (Leo is real big in the backside and legs) so sweatpants and inexpensive jeans...
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...Lane read (for school), played video games. I noticed he got something to eat every hour or so, pbj sandwiches ( 2 in the morning and 2 in the afternoon), cookies, chips. After dinner he and I finished off the pie with ice cream. He had 4 glasses of milk. As far as clothes go, your idea..
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
.2 pieces toast, butter, jelly + glass OJ. Lunch: two tuna salad sandwiches, chocolate milk, cookies, apple. Dinner, spaghetti marinara sauce and Italian sausage, (2 helpings), broccoli w/ Italian dressing, milk, pie. During the morning we did chores, then I worked in the afternoon while...
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/24/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Sarah, Leo is on a class trip this weekend, so just Lane and me. Both boys have big appetites. I make sure they have 3 healthy meals a day. When we have pizza for dinner, we always have a big salad too. No dessert unless the boys eat their veggies. Lane ate yesterday: breakfast, oatmeal /milk...
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/21/19  - IP#: 39.44.71.xxx
Also do they have double chin, lovehandles(these are indicators that one is obese), also does your oldest have fat rolls making it difficult to do exercises, then u can do sit down exercises, like sit ups, lunges maybe, also does he get back pain after walking many blocks or red in the face?
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/21/19  - IP#: 39.44.71.xxx
Is important because if they're overweight at 12 years and they continue to gain then in their late teens they won't be able to enjoy teenage years so don't make them feel humiliated but politely make them understand rather than being to late to address the issue
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/21/19  - IP#: 39.44.71.xxx
..that they've gained weight, so wearing something fitted on the body may make them realize and they'll not gain more. Also don't buy much baggy t shirts also they don't make the kids realise of their weight gain, and not fitted but normal size shirts So they don't feel fat too but realisation..
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/21/19  - IP#: 39.44.71.xxx
Jesse, does your kids eat a lot in general or do they eat a lot of junk food, or sugary stuff? You also said they wear sweat pants around the house, probably stop that, because that's where the problem lies as they don't know when they've gained as they're pants are stretchy and they don't realis
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
..seconds and thirds at meals, just like Leo had been doing. They're not self conscious at all about how fat they are. When we were in Florida in January, they had no problem going shirtless. They have cousins there who are chubby and nothing was said about how big my boys have gotten.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...Papa reload every month. You asked if they started to put on eeight afrer my wife died. Not right away, Leo started to get a little chubby 4 years ago, took boys husky sizes, then his weight ballooned 2 years ago. Lane got chubby when Leo's weight took off, then last summer he started eating
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...with meals. They bring home lunch to school (no school cafeteria). Sandwiches, cookies, chips, piece of fruit.School sells milk, ice cream, fruit juice. Both boys have an allowance which I know they spend on snacks. My wife's parents (they live in Florida) gave them debit cards which Mama and
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
..pudding, cool whip. Their mom would have gotten a kick out of it, although she baked from scratch. For dinner we always have protein, starch, veggies (boy's like all veg), dessert. Breakfast weekdays is cereal/milk, toast, milk, fruit. Weekends we make pancakes/waffles, eggs, meat. They drink milk
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
One thing we all do together is cook and bake. Their mom loved and left a recipe file and sometimes we make her specialties. Both really get a kick out of helping me and they make simple recipes themselves. Last night they made dessert, chocolate cream pies. Bought pie shells, instant
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Both have old phones that can only be used to call/text. Lane is going through a stage where he asks me a lot about his mom. Leo has memories of her but Lane doesn't so it's hard for him. Lane looks more like her (hair and eye color, shape of face) and he's happy when I remind him of that.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Leo has never broken any furniture. They both like school and at parent-teacher conferences I am always told their peer relationships at school are very good. Their free time at home is spent reading (encouraged by school + their mom loved to read), video games. Limited time on their laptop.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Both boys go to a charter school with no dress code so they wear sweatpants and polo shirts (men's size XXL for Leo, same size as me, L for Lane. If we go somewhere where sweatpants aren't appropriate they wear jeans as I said before.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Sarah, Leo doesn't mention any of the pain you describe. Lane either. When we go to the mall we're not racing around. Leo is a little slow because he saddles but no problem. We're not walking long distances. Both boys say they're tired and hungry after walking. Both do chores at home, no problems.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
Does Leo have any pain related to his weight? Or pain when he gets up from sleep or gets up from the couch after long time? Many overweight kids experience that also when they are standing up after long time, does he find difficult to stand at one place for a long time like shopping in malls for very long and wants to rest or sit down? Does he finds it irritating to go to malls because of all the walking? And do you find it difficult to find them shirt and tees for their sizes, and their waists, and in school does he wears uniform, how do u get them in his size? Has someone ever fatshamed Leo, or has he been through any embarrassing moment of breaking chair or stuff, kids usually eat more then and try to show that they are okay with their weight when they are actually hurt on the inside. How do you see Leo's weight, does it bother you him being unhealthy when many kids his age are more athletic. Also you said that you were overweight but I think you would not be as high as Leo is now, because at your age your 12 year old outweighs you, so you must be husky or pudgy but not obese for sure as you now weigh as him.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
I think working on your oldest's weight, making him exercise, and being strict with him on food will in turn help the youngest as u said he follows him.And your oldest weighs more than u,n later if he is taller,he still will put on more weight and his weight will be more compare to height and an issue.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
If they love ice cream then probably not stop them but no harm in buying serving for one other than buying and storing tubs of ice cream at home, this way they get encouraged to eat more. What kind of foods and sweet/desserts do they have throughout the day,in what quantity?
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
...but it can be done in a decent way, telling the kid to eat healthily and like you said if he was having peanut butter and bread,that you can subsititue brown for white bread. There is low caloried options, why don't go for that for their favourite foods.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
I can understand that fat shaming must be a sensitive topic for you, like any other normal parent, but it's ones duty as a parent to make the child realise when they have crossed the line between being chubby to being fat or obese, and it's not necessary to be harsh or humiliate the kid
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
Oh, it's tragic with what happened to your wife and I can imagine how it would have effected your family. Do you think it also played a part in their weight gain and they were gaining weight all those years but it became evident only when they turned 10 or 11?What do they have for lunch dinner?
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Both boys have friends at school and sometimes i have some of them over for a sleepover on the weekend. Lane really looks up to Leo and Leo is real cool with his younger brother, so no problems there luckily. I notice that if Lane wants or doesn't want to do something, Lane always follows.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
It's later here. Lane just got up and told me he couldn't sleep because he's hungry, so i told him to take a banana or an apple. I went jnto the kitchen and found him making a peanut butter and banana sandwich. So what would you have me do? Take the food from him? No way would i do that.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...inseam and Leo is shorter (5'2" to my 5'7") so we just roll up the legs. Lane is now too big for boys husky sizes so he wears mens 32/28 relaxed fit jeans with the legs rolled up. Most of the time they just wear sweatpants, more stretchy so don't have to buy new clothes so often.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
When I got engaged, my mother was very critical of her because of her size. After a big argument, I decided to cut off all contact with my mother, she's so toxic. So I am sensitive about my boys feeling ashamed of how they look. Right now Leo and I wear the same size jeans (42 waist). I take a 30
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
By the time I was 14 I had grown 5 inches taller and lost 20 lbs, but I was so embarrassed about my body I never took my shirt or boxer shorts off even in the PE locker room. My wife was a big help in helping me accept myself as I am. I miss her so much. If it wasn't for my son's I couldn't go on.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
...a ton of weight. I was averafe size until 11/12 when i started to quickly put on a lot of weight (70 lbs). My mother went nuts, fat shamed me at every chance, would ask family at get-togethers what they thought of my big boy boobs, big belly, and big rear end. I was totally embarrassed.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
wife was driving home from a baby shower (would have been our thurd, a little girl). I was home with my boys. They were 5 and 3 at the time. Each of them was over 8 lbs at birth, chubby the first year, then were average weight until each got to 9/10, when he started eating a lot and put on
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Sarah, I'll try to answer all your questions. Please bear with me as I access this site from my phone and I can only input 300 characters at a time.The boy's mom, my wife, was always heavy. 200 lbs when we got married. She died in a car crash 7 years ago (our car was hit by a drunk driver as my
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/19/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
Jesse, do you give in to their demands of junk food? What lunch and dinner do they have, how many helpings, what type of snacks do they eat and how many times? Do you say no when you think they've had enough eating for the day? Why don't you try exercises at home like sit ups if they don't want to go out?How many hours do they spend on the couch munching and playing video games? If they don't realise they're overweight then why not weighing them and yourself together as your oldest may be near or more than your weight and shorter, why not swapping clothes of your oldest with you and if they don't fit him in the waist or hips( hint him in a polite way), what are his hips and waist measurements anyway, are they larger than you then you? You could maybe make them realize this way but obviously making sure they don't feel humiliated or hurt, but do get your message through. It's good that you at least took them out for walk but why didn't you tell them no when they came back and ate bowls of ice cream? Is it because they throw tantrums or feel bad or think that you're fatshaming them or just you didn't wanted to refuse them? How was their mother on their weight, did she have any problem with them being overweight? Does Leo have difficulty and needs help in any stuff like clothes due to his weight, do he needs bigger chairs in school or do kids call him names or bully him or he has friends?
 
Reply from Dave, Child's Age 15 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 77.18.56.xxx
At least half an hour walk and then food is better than no walk and probably having food anyway. It's more important introducing some physical activity than a diet. How is your oldest about walking when he that big, can he walk for half an hour without pain?
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/18/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
Jesse, I think that it's good that you initiated your boys to go for a walk, but if they are not willing to do it on regularly then there's no use as a walk a day and then eating a lot after coming back would do more harm to their weight than the good that the 15 min walk would do, tell them this
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/16/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
going by myself, Lane asked me to bring back some
peanut butter and bread (we ran out) I said I need the exercise (hint) and Lane told me I'm not fat and I shouldn't worry. This from my son with a big pot belly and huge butt. They just don't seem to realize how fat they are.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/16/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
It's hard for Leo because his legs and hips are big and he saddles when he walks. After we got home, both boys headed to the fridge and got bowls of ice cream. Today is colder but I suggested we walk again but both boys begged off, saying they were busy reading for school. When I said that I was
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/16/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Sarah, it's a busy time for me at work because of tax season. Yesrerday was very warm at after I picked the boys up from schoo and our McD's stop I suggested we go for a walk because I need to be more active and lose weight. They came with me but both complained of being tired after 4 or 5 blocks.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/13/19  - IP#: 39.44.115.xxx
Jesse, I face the same problem with my son too but I try hard not to give up. Just stick in there.
Do you do any exercise related stuff at home with them,Zumba or some other routines? Those are real helpful.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/10/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
I decided to try to lead my son's to eat less by example since I need to lose weight too. At Subway for lunch, I order a chopped salad, my son's each order a foot long + chips + cookies. I didn't want to make a scene so didn't say anything.
 
Reply from Jesse, Child's Age 12 - 03/10/19  - IP#: 174.239.1.xxx
Sarah, not having success. Trying to cut down on food intake for all 3 of us (I'm up to 233 pounds) but my sons insist they're hungry. This morning I limited their breakfast to cereal/milk, but an hour later they had made themselves nutella sandwiches because they were still hungry, they said.
 
Reply from Sarah, Child's Age 12 - 03/06/19  - IP#: 39.44.173.xxx
Jesse, are you continuing any diet with your boys?