My name is Heather and Im 15 years old. I reside in Ohio, United States and currently weigh around 165 lbs at 5'5''. I know that I'm at risk of being overweight, and my health and heartrate is pretty horrible. When I was about 12 years old I was diagnosed with Obsesive Compulsive and Depression. I was put on loads of different type of medicines, but none seemed to help me. They only caused more and more weight gain. I became so depressed I ate constantly, slept all day and only went to a half day of school. I gained 40 pounds at this time in my life which devistated me very much. I had several suicide attemts by the time I turned 14, and at that time had began 8th grade at a different school. My depression had gotten betterafter being put on Prozac, and I had made 7 best friends. I always felt ugly and fat compared to them. They all had these gorgeous bodies I envied. By the summer before 9th grade, my depression had gone away but I still had extreamly low self-esteem. I would blantly say I hated myself and not think anything of it. I was constantly told I wasnt fat, and I complained all the time.
When 9th grade began, my depression was fully gone and I started the year on a positive note... but things began to go downhill from there. I absolutly despised myself and it was really hard for me to get up every morning and look in the mirror. My mom hired me a personal trainor which I still go to 3 times a week. I had to be pulled out of school and become home schooled because I had complete lack of focas, then being diagnosed with ADHD. Things were going great... when then I finally just got completly fed up with my weight and turned to bulimia. I had been casually throwing up in my bathroom after almost every meal for about 1 week. After one of my vomiting trips, I became extreamly dizzy. I felt like a truck had just hit me and I was about to die. I had to tell my mom what was going on and I was rushed to the hospital before I fainted. I stopped for about a week and then snapped. I began to throw up more and more, not even caring. At church one Sunday, we had a house of prayer. For the first time in my life, I walked up to the front stage and prayed on hands and knees. God helped me realize the damage I was causing upon myself. I became very dizzy that night and ran to my mom, who then found out I started up again.
Now, I'm always dizzy and have damaged alot of my insides. I still work with my personal trainer for 1 hour 3 times a week. I've gained alot of muscle, but havent seemed to loose much fat at all. I came to this site because Im really fed up with my weight, and am certainly not willing to go back to damaging my body. I really enjoyed reading everything and its really helped and motivated me to loose weight, not only to look better, but to be healthier too. My goal is 130-135 and with this site and the help of its members, I think I can accomplish it. :) Thank you.
<3 heather



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