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From Madison, Age 17

Ht. 5'6", Start: 225 lb, Today: 225 lb, Goal: 225 lb - I used to use this site for weight loss help and such, but over the past couple of years I've actually become pretty ill. I gained a lot of weight, which at this point I will not be able to lose (on a lot of medications that cause weight gain, as well as more often than not so stiff and in so much pain I can barely walk, so eating right alone isn't enough, and nothing else is currently possible for me). It's really hard to deal with, especially the lack of control. I can't remember a time when I didn't feel like I was too big, but gaining 100 pounds in four years due to things that came with me getting sick (which comes with a plethora of other challenges as well) has been more than a little difficult for me. Despite it not being any fault of my own, I do get made fun of for it. And it's just hard to be heavy, period, in today's world. I can never find clothes that fit properly. I never look good anymore. So I suppose I was just wondering if anyone had any tips or advice on how to keep one's self-esteem up, despite being heavy. I'm at my wit's end struggling with my self-loathing that is mostly due to my size. I'm not really sure how much longer I can go on like this, so I need some help figuring out how to handle it...