From Jennifer, Child's Age 11 - 04/11/25 - IP#: 88.14.5.xxx Click here to reply
Hello everyone. I have a very obese daughter called Amy. She needs an electric wheelchair to get around, and her doctor says she may develop serious health problems in the future. I'm not sure how to feel about that. I know I should get Amy to eat healthy and lose weight, but it's really hard for her. She's used to eating as much as she wants (I admit, that's entirely my fault) and she gets really sad when she doesn't get food. I don't think she ever spends more than a few seconds at a time without some kind of candy, junk food or sugary drink in her mouth. The poor girl just can't stop eating. And exercise is basically impossible; she can barely waddle to the bathroom even with help. I have conflicting feelings about this. On one hand, I know I should take the doctor's advice seriously, but I also want my daughter to be happy, and I know she's not happy when she has to diet or do exercise. And I think she still looks really beautiful at this size. She just broke 700 pounds at age 11, and aside from mobility and getting out of breath, she doesn't seem to have any serious health issues yet. I'm not sure if I should let her keep gaining like this.
Reply from Logan, Child's Age 9 - 04/23/25 - IP#: 135.148.139.xxx I'm currently waiting in the parents chat room.
Reply from Logan, Child's Age 9 - 04/23/25 - IP#: 135.148.139.xxx How? Parentschatroom? Email or Discord?
Reply from Jennifer, Child's Age 11 - 04/23/25 - IP#: 77.227.142.xxx To Logan: Is that so? Could you tell me more about that, please? Any info/advice is helpul right now.
Reply from Logan, Age 9 - 04/22/25 - IP#: 135.148.139.xxx Hi Jennifer, don't let your daughter stress you out! She's just really hungry, and you're trying to satisfy her hunger.
Reply from Jennifer, Child's Age 11 - 04/22/25 - IP#: 77.227.142.xxx To Angel: I know I'm not following her doctor's advice, and I know Amy's diet is unhealthy. I've already tried the things you suggest, but they don't work if the kid simply refuses to cooperate. If we let her make food or buy it with her own money, she still only eats junk. If we try to get her to stop eating even for a little while, she cries and complains all the way and starts gorging herself as soon as she can. And if we try to change her diet, she refuses to eat anything until we give her what she wants. We're working with the doctor to fix this, but so far we've had no luck. I will post if we manage to make any progress. Thank you for your concern.
Reply from Hanna, Child's Age 9 - 04/22/25 - IP#: 77.111.246.xxx My two boys weigh aprox 145 and 210 lbs, but they're also very tall for their age. That means your child weighs twice as much as my two sons combined. And when I look at the diet your daughter eats, I really wonder if you have the ambition to help your daughter lose the weight. @Angel, I understand you completely.
Reply from Angel, Child's Age 9 - 04/21/25 - IP#: 141.226.11.xxx Based on your description of Amy's atrocious diet, you are not following the doctor's advice. You are under the mistaken impression that if your daughter refuses to eat healthy food and drink plain water, you must feed her extraordinary abundance of sugar and fat. There are other options. You can reduce the sugar without eliminating it, and if Amy doesn't like the taste, tell her she can make her own food if she can get the money somehow, not from you or her other parent. Or you can do an intervention that might involve short periods of fasting, like 3 hours in the afternoon with no food at all, strictly enforced, and if you catch her sneaking food, the clock restarts and she has to wait 4 hours, not just 3. I struggle with managing my son's behavior, too. Parenting is not easy and never was easy. I think you are not trying to help your daughter in what could be a life-threatening crisis. I don't use those words casually. There are lots of 300, 400, and 500 pound children on the bulletin boards and other places I have seen, and I don't lose sleep over them. If your story is true, that your daughter weighs more than 700 pounds at age 11, she is in far more trouble than you seem to realize, and I have lost some sleep over her predicament.
Reply from Jennifer, Child's Age 11 - 04/21/25 - IP#: 77.227.142.xxx Hello everyone! Thanks for replying! To Hanna: Amy mostly eats sweets (such as candy bars, pastries and candy) and junk food (like McDonald's, pizza and fried chicken). We've tried to get her to eat fruits and veggies a few times, but she refuses. She doesn't like water either, so she usually drinks soda (with extra sugar) and milkshakes (a very fattening mix with heavy cream, butter and many sugary ingredients). We've tried to get her to drink healthy too, but she can tell if the drink isn't as sugary as she likes, so it's been hard. Her hygiene is fine, but she needs help to shower properly. To James: I'm afraid we can't get in touch anywhere else, but feel free to post about your daughter! I'd love to hear about her. To Angel: Believe me, we have taken her to the doctor many times. She doesn't seem to have any disorder (other than her food addiction, of course), she just really, really loves to eat. We have considered homeschooling, but so far she's going to regular school and aside from needing a wheelchair she's doing fine. CPS hasn't gotten involved yet, fortunately, but there's been threats from some people to call them. I don't know what to do...
Reply from Hanna, Age 9 - 04/20/25 - IP#: 77.111.246.xxx I have two sons, 9 and 12. They're really chubby, but nothing compared to your daughter! What does Amy eat all day? And how's her hygiene? And James, how much does your child weigh?
Reply from James, Child's Age 10 - 04/17/25 - IP#: 76.108.251.xxx Hi there. My daughter is also super extremely obese. She sounds like your daughter. Is there any way we can get in touch?
Reply from Angel, Child's Age 9 - 04/15/25 - IP#: 141.226.10.xxx Hello Jennifer. I read your post and your daughter Amy's post in the preteens bulletin board. Angel is not my real name, but I do have a 9-year-old son who weighs just over 100 pounds. Your situation is much more serious. There is nothing to doubt or delay treatment for Amy's severe obesity and food addiction. You can afford to pay for the help she needs, if you cut junk food out of your budget, and pay for a social worker, a dietitian, more visits with the doctor you just met, and other options. I have been following this website and other online forums about being overweight for the last 20 years, on and off. I have never read any credible report of an 11-year-old person who weighs 700 pounds, until now. It is possible that this has never happened to anyone before. You need to ask yourself why Amy is eating the food and sugary drinks you are feeding her. It's easy to blame childish temptation and our society, but that doesn't explain why many other children who are given similar opportunities to overeat have nonetheless maintained a healthy weight and refused to eat extra food they didn't need. I humbly suggest you ask your doctor to test Amy for Prader-Willi syndrome. It's a rare genetic disorder, found in about 1 person out of every 10,000, based on what I read a few years ago. It's characterized by the person never feeling full even when his or her stomach is stretched to its full capacity. This causes people to eat and eat without stopping until there is no food left, unless treatment is provided and followed. It's possible your daughter just loves to eat, but I think if you try to feed her carrots and beans, it's more complicated. Anyway, the bottom line is that if you let your daughter keep gaining weight, you risk losing her in two ways. First, her breathing problems may become too severe for her to keep on breathing. Second, if your state has a child protective services agency and they become aware of the problem, they may have legal authority to remove Amy from your home, based on the "best interest of the child" in custody matters. I assume Amy is homeschooled, since in a public school setting, the child protective services agency could have been asking you some tough questions 200 pounds earlier in Amy's life. Please get help. If you would like to continue the conversation, feel free to reply with your email address (can be real or a throwaway account, your choice) and I can share more of what I learned. Good luck!
