From XxXLotsOfLettersxXx, Age 15 - 06/20/10 - IP#: 71.98.105.xxx  Click here to reply  
Ht. 5'4", Start: 160 lb, Today: 188 lb (BMI %tile: 98), Goal: 128 lb - Heyy.
How are you guys?
I want to ask a question...
Is it right for your boyfriend to tell you that you need to lose weight?
I was wandering because my boyfriend is always saying stuff like " you know I love you for who you are but you need to lose weight" or "you are so pretty but if you lost some weight you would look and feel better about yourself"
like if he sees me eating chips he'll be like "woah look how much calories are in those"
and I know he loves me and is just trying to help but he knows I'm really sensitive about that stuff , and it doesn't help when he's 6 feet 130 pounds and 17 , he's like a stick.
And I don't know... Some of the stuff he says even if he's trying to help it makes me feel like crap.
So my question is what do I say when he says stuff that hurts
Reply from Juliette, Age 17 - 06/21/10  - IP#: 99.237.131.xxx
Hey hun. What you're going through is Tough. And it's one of those things where only you can decide. Personally, i think the boyfriend is being insensitive towards you. Sure he loves you and wants you to be healthy, but at the same time, it's rude for him to always comment on what you eat, what you do and the choices you make. it's your life, and your decisions. He has to have some more tact and respect the fact that you can figure things out by yourself and don't need him to constantly comment on what you do.
Also, it's completely unnaceptable for him to "say things that make you feel like crap". Regardless of his intentions, it's totally unacceptable. What you need is motivation, supoprt and love. His support. Tell him that. tell him that the way he's reacting isn't working right now and that instead you want him to just show his support through loving you and supporting whatever you do, no matter his opinion.
Also, a boyfriend is suppose to love you and respect you the way you are. Not 30 pounds lighter not 1 pound lighter. Just the way you are. After all, isn't that why you're in a relationship for? Tell him that.
All the best to you! I hope you find the love and support to carry you through the hard day. xo ~ Juliette