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Message Replying To
From Tessa, child's age 14
Hello, it has been a crazy beginning of the year for all of us. DH works in the medical field, and I work in retail management/marketing for a supermarket so luckily we are both still employed and not facing down this crisis head on like so many people.
Lots of ups and downs. My oldest has basically reached his goal weight of 150lbs (at 5 foot 8) so we are all very proud of him.
That said, this virus and lockdown has hit right when our kids would normally be the busiest with sports and activities, and while we have been stressing maintaining an active lifestyle (playing basketball, biking safely, etc) both me and DH are working longer and more unpredictable hours so we can't really check up on my middle son's (Jack, 14YO) activity levels.
In early March, he did come to us and ask for help with his weight, which was a surprise as before he had been very argumentative about his weight gain. So we all actually got him to a nutritionist and his doctor right before the lockdown started to make a plan, and left feeling very positive with the plan.
Sadly, with the lockdown, he has definitely put on more weight, which has left him more and more defeated and has led him to not want to continue. We have, as the doctors suggested, weighed him biweekly, and he has gaine around ten pounds since the visit, going from around 207lbs to around 218ish. We have stressed that we understand that it is a bad time, and that we understand that it is hard to stay active and eat appropriately in these circumstances, and that all we want for him is to do his best, but I fear he has lost a lot of his motivation, especially since his football coach has warned the kids that even if school is in session next year the football season is likely to be suspended, and I suspect football was one of his driving motivations since he was basically told after last season if he didn't get more fit he would likely not make varsity next year.
I'm at an impass and struggling. When this all started he was suddenly very motivated and even talked to us about his feelings regarding his weight (that he felt fat and thought his belly was ugly) which he had never been willing to do before other then platitudes that he was 'fine' or 'plenty skinny.' To go from that to where we are now with him telling us he doesn't care and that he thinks he was meant to be fat just like his dad, so why does it matter is troubling and makes me and my husband's hearts break for him. My husband himself, who already blames himself enough being obese himself (though trying to lose weight himself).