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From chellie, Age 14

I feel so down now. Yesterday i binged on just about everything that i could get my hands on and i couldn't stop, It was really bad, I knew that I was conciouslly binging but I COULDN'T stop. I know that i was upset over something a stupid guy said in gym and that was why i was binging. I need help. How can i sort of my emotional stuff and not go to food. Seriously i know i have felt my feelings before and i don't wanna feel them again. I've been depressed before ( even though i wasn't diagnosed, when u think about sucide for almost a whole week, then your pretty sure that ur depressed after you come out of it and relise how stupid u were even to think that crap) anyways that was two years ago, but i deffiantly don't wanna go back there. I just don't know wut i should do to raise my confidence and self respect. I really wanna join or sport team or so sumtime of after school sctivity. Maybe that while allow me to be myself and make friends and such, but i its a longshot. I donno why I'm just going on like this. I just geuss that it reminded me of the oringinal reason of wanting to loose weight was after that bout of depression and well I don't want to go through that again to get a kick start into loosing weight. If ya know wut i mean. I was doing so good, especially since i had just fineshed JAy McGraw's book while i was home sick and I was following the steps that identified everything (like emotional eating)I just don't know wut i did wrong. I'm just so lost. :( chellie