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From Kate, Age 18

I know this sounds weird, but I am not sure if I want to be thin. I mean, I've been overweight my whole life, and my whole life, I've been able to hide all my feelings--my anger, my sadness, my pain--behind the spoonful of ice cream in my mouth and the blanket of fat on my body. I don't know how to cope without those "crutches". Not only that, but I've never had to deal with the problems "pretty" girls have--no one has ever flirted with me at a party, whistled at me while I walked down the street, and I have never had to wonder whether someone was being nice to me because I was pretty or because they actually liked me.On the other hand, I want to be one of the pretty girls so badly. I know that I'm 18, and I shouldn't be so shallow, but I can't help it. Any advice?