Message Replying To

From clifford, Age 15

god today i got upset cuz my dad called and was threatening to call the police to make me go with him tonight since i didnt want to go and i was cryin for like 30-60 mins and i was almost hyperventalating and I was just so scared and didnt no whut to do and was depressed i was hitting myself thorwing things and of course whut i hate is eating and now i feel bad even my 2 10 mile bike rides that burned 772 cals didnt help me any and I hate it and feel that I need to do something and I just feel like hurting myself i was hitting my self earlier cuz i was sooo upset and then i read this journal my mom started when i was 16 months and enede it like 2 years later and I was just really upset and it had stuff bout my cousin who died and my cousin who moved to chicago and havent seen in a while and I just wish everything would get better I hate my life and I am constantly eatin when i get sad or depressed and i need help with that but i dont want to talk to any like no professional or anything cuz they think they no me and they dont and I hate it y is this like this. well so al in all i ate like crap and am totally not motivated to loose this weight right now i hate life someone please help me