Hey christine! well i noe how u feel i mean u say ur afraid of gaining da pounds if u eat but trust me dont worry bout dat. If u think u need to loose go to LA weight loss center where dey will give u a plan where u can eat and not starve urself n soon as u losse da pounds u want to loose dey teach how to maintane . it really helps and works . Hope da best for u if u really wanna noe like wat im talkin about and how dis thing works just write me a message kk buh-bye !